Forget the terrible twos and the horrible threes -let’s talk about the little monster that shows up when your child turns five!
A few weeks ago, the clock struck midnight, and the transformation began. Smoke billowed out of my son’s room, accompanied by flashes of lightning and a thunderous roar. Within seconds, a switch had been flipped, and we found ourselves living with a pint-sized jerk-store. Happy 5th birthday, son.
Our once sweet little boy, known for his nurturing and caring heart, has now turned into an opinionated, sarcastic, back-talking little turd! Are other parents going through this? Where did we go wrong? How did this change happen so fast? I thought boys didn’t start becoming hormonal nightmares until their teenage years.
The worst part about this negative attitude transformation is that it’s not just confined to our home, where we can control it a little easier. We cautiously venture out into the world to run errands, just waiting for our little temper tantrum time bomb to explode. What horrific scene will he cause in public today? At grocery stores, at the park, in the mall… nowhere is safe. Where can we hide? We’ve even had an instructor at his rock climbing class tell him, “You need to chill out, dude.”
Oh, and this is new and fun too - if our little back-talker doesn’t get his way, he has no problem throwing himself on the ground with clenched fists and flailing limbs, rocking moves you wouldn’t even see in a Zumba class. The words “NO” and “STOP IT” just don’t seem to work anymore. “QUIET” and “STOP CRYING” won’t even get a reaction. And don’t even bother trying “GO TO YOUR ROOM.” He laughs them all off with a sarcastic little sneer. Our punishments lost all effectiveness the moment he took a bite of his 5th birthday cake.
To combat Mr. Whiny-Pants’ new style, our parental reactions have had to become a little more creative. We’ve had to adapt to new punishment tactics. Taking away some of his favorite things has seemed to be a worthy violation of his little world. Threats of no more outdoor swimming pool time or no more TV have seemed to work just a bit. And if we need to, we lay the hammer down by threatening to - gasp - take away the mac ‘n’ cheese! Noooo!
Another great tool we’ve found that has helped curtail the nightmarish behavior is the chore chart! We have a couple posted on the wall in our kitchen that have helped with the behaviors and responsibilities we expect around the house.
Simple tasks like feeding the dog and picking up after yourself now get rewarded with star stickers and smiley faces that can be exchanged for time at the water park or maybe a little toy the next time we’re out shopping. So far, the chore chart has been working - so if you’ve been experiencing some of the same problems I have, I highly recommend it. It’s a nice visual diagram that your kid can look at, and they can see how their good behavior is paying off! You can find a ton of premade templates online if you’re stumped on how to make one. Hope it works for you as much as it has for us - the only downside is that I don’t get all that extra mac ‘n’ cheese lying around the house anymore!
Photography credit: Jeremy Padgett
